The Clash of Life

There are times and days that make you pause. Some times it can be bad news you hear. It can be something that turns your life upside down. It could be some harsh criticism that came your way through no fault of your own. It is at those times that I have to stop and collect my mind. My mind is usually going in all directions and never pausing to hear my stop warnings.

You are what you think. Well, if that's true I could be a bowl of mess. My thoughts can be so disjointed and on those days so rattled that it is difficult to make sense of anything.

Today was one of those days. I hate death and dying. I do not like to be separated from anyone whom I love. I do not like knowing for sure that nothing can be done. I do not like losing dear friends or family to disease. Why can't they figure out how to cure cancer? What seems to be the problem? How many more people have to die from this dreaded illness. I know there have been major breakthroughs and I'm thankful for those. I just don't like losing another person then another. I know they may be old. Who cares? They still have beautiful souls that laugh and love others. Isn't that good enough?

I know that God works in all things. I realize that life is about toil and troubles that may come your way at any time. I know that pain and separation are a part of life.

I believe in my higher power whom I choose to call God. All of that is a given. I know people can't live forever or we'd be full. I know people have to get old (not exciting at all). I am sensitive to the fact that the body wears out.

My issue is about a mystery that I may never know. It is about the all knowing ,all loving, all powerful God that is moving and working even as I am writing this post. Why God does the pain have to feel so great. Why does the ache have to hurt through to the soul. Why does it have to happen again and again and again?

Lenten Beginnings

Today we had a Lenten Prayer Breakfast. There were many "aha" moments during the session. One in particular was the thought of prayer in our life. At this time of Lent, I am reminded of what Dietrich Bonhoeffer said about prayer:

Prayer does not mean simply to pour out one's heart. It means rather to find the way to God and to speak with him, whether the heart is full or empty.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Some times I fail to recognize if my heart is full or empty. How can that be? I believe that I am not unlike many persons who are simply not in touch with themselves. We for the most part have no clear direction in our lives. We allow ourselves to be thrown from one side of the boat to the other. We let the wind alter our course and blow us to places we never intended. We are really never in control of our lives and our world. We don't even sit still long enough to know what we are thinking or feeling. Is our heart full or empty? More importantly, what is making it that way. I ponder at times if that is really all bad. God has control of the boat anyway!

We are about to begin another Lenten season. A time for reflection and pause in our lives. I invite every person to spend time with themselves this Lenten season. Sit, pray or contemplate all that God has in store for you. Look at what has come between you and God. Concentrate on keeping your journey simple, focused and aimed towards God. Try to sit with yourself even if it makes you uncomfortable. It is in our discomfort that we learn the most about ourselves. Whatever is between you and God needs to be examined for its merit. Perhaps it stays. Most likely, it goes and we become more in tuned to our creator.

A Land of the Holy

I returned last Friday from a ten day trip to the Holy Land. As I saw so many ancient 1st century artifacts, I also saw barbed wire atop walls separating and isolating nation by nation. The city of Bethlehem which is in the West Bank was isolated by a wall separating it from the rest of Jerusalem. It was difficult to see Christ between the wall, barbed wire and land mines signs.

Muslin, Hebrew, Christian all inhabited the smallest of geographic areas.

On our last day, we visited the Holocaust museum in Jerusalem. Mounds of shoes left before people went to their death. People who were slowly and methodically isolated and inhibited from their day to day activities. The horrific sights and sounds of people telling their story. The woman who cried as she echoed the horrors of those days.

All the while it made me think about what I was seeing in Israel. People intentionally being separated from economic and social opportunities. Have the people of Israel forgotten all they endured not too long ago?

A small country with so much going for it. A beautiful land, a fertile land for thousands of years. Religion seeming to go side by side with the land, the people and the story.